nearly 21... again!

As it occurs this is now my 20th post. I've been told by a few people from work they enjoy reading my blogs and find them interesting and honest. I don't know what possessed me to start a blog in the first place about my life, my thoughts and ideas, sending it out on the internet for whoever is interested in reading it. But I have to say, you feel pretty good when people tell you they like your blog. I started blogging to relieve my mind of its daily chores. Its like a diary, yes, as it expresses how i'm feeling about whatevers on my mind, and also to share my opinions on different parts of... life. I guess you could say things get stuck in your head that go round and round and no matter what it is, writing about it feels good. That's why i do it.

On a different note...Work is getting better and to my surprise i actually had a good day. I woke up 1 minute before my alarm was ready to go off, quickly put my phone on silent and went back to sleep, waking up an hour later to realise i had 15mins before i should leave for work. Shit! In that time i jumped so quickly out of bed you could of swore an ant bit my ass or something, ripped my clothes off, turned on the hot water for the shower whilst anxiously trying to get the cling wrap off my arm from my tattoo (Of course it didn't come off easily...it was sticky and dry, the glad wrap glued together) Basically, I did the usual things we do to get ready including tidying up and making the bed - a very rare occasion i might add and set off for work. Now, i wasn't really late, i just knew i needed some breakfast from Marina Mirage and last time i ordered a fruit salad it took half'n'hour. I can't imagine why it takes that long to cut up fresh fruit however it did so i gave myself (well, actually them..) extra time. Those of you that live on the Gold Coast would have noticed the rain today. Slightly drizzling on and off for most of the day, yet the actual weather was okay, not too cold. We had a major problem at work though which completely slipped my mind simply because i had a good day and all of us worked together (for once in a long time i might add) and got through it. Work again tomorrow with the same team and fingers crossed there's no bitching, or moaning. I'm so tired of it. Okay, so we don't have to get along all the time, again we aren't meant to but PLEASE just go to work and do your job. By the way, i am not pin pointing anyone here, i'm talking about every person in our department including me.

Any who, god i wish i was more confident sometimes. I'd like to achieve more and learn at work: to put it simple, I'm knowledge hungry and i want in! But today i just couldn't suck it up and talk to the people i needed to about it. I got through one hurdle - that was a piece of cake. I do realise it is only up to me though and i'm completely grateful for my friends who have helped so far and... oh what the heck, I just need a kick up the butt. I should just stop trying to make excuses and just say 'hello, how are you? Its Jodie...' because one phone call is all it will take. Someone once told me that a successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at her. Very true and very relevant to how i'm approaching this situation. I was about to say 'predicament' but that might confuse you.

You know, I mentioned earlier that i was afraid of something and that when i told him i wanted him to hold me, tell me i'm beautiful and help me. This is exactly what he did. He gives me courage, so tomorrow i have a goal to by the end of the day, make that phone call. I'm not a has-been, i'm a will-be and I will not live down to expectations but go out there and do something remarkable.

A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage.  Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort.  ~Sydney Smith

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy who'll decide where to go.
~Dr. Seuss